The life of a coach’s wife means you move around A LOT, which is not something I was familiar with growing up. Heck, when my parents needed to move into a bigger house they moved a mile down the road! I would never have imagined moving eight times (three of those moves in the last four years) and living so many different places.
While I held a number of different jobs early on in our marriage, I am currently staying home to take care of our three young girls. As a stay-at-home mom there can definitely be moments of feeling isolated. Throw moving to a new city in the mix, and there’s bound to be some soul searching.
Questions of “what do we do now?”, “what’s the best place to meet new friends?”, “is this the right decision?” are all fresh in my mind.
Whether you’re a coach’s wife looking for some guidance or a friend wondering how I stay sane moving so many times, you’ve come to the right place!
Here are 6 tips I’ve learned along the way for having a successful move before, during, and after.
You can’t do it all on your own
Every time we’ve made a move, whether it was with or without kids, I always made sure to reach out to people for help.
When your spouse reports to their new job within a week, or even a few days, it can be a bit overwhelming. Call your parents or siblings to come visit and pack. If you have to sell your home ask a friend if it’s ok if you can come hang during showings. Whatever it is, it’s ok to ask for help!
I pride myself in the fact that I can take care of everything, but sometimes it’s nice to know you don’t have to do it all; and it’s a great way to make memories with your friends and loved ones before you leave town.
Bucket list of people you want to see
We have met so many wonderful people over the years and it would be weird for me to just up and leave without saying goodbye.
Sometimes it’s fun to have a girls night out with a big group and other times getting together for coffee with a friend for some quality conversation is all you need. Doing this has helped me with closure and being able to start fresh at our new place.
Let the movers pack the kitchen!
If you have any wiggle room or extra money to put towards your move I HIGHLY suggest letting the movers pack your kitchen. We’ve been fortunate enough to be able to have this done with the majority of our moves and it has kept my sanity.
Most of the stuff we own I feel very comfortable packing on my own—bedding, bathroom towels, toys, etc. But the kitchen is its own beast. So much glass, and so many items! It’s peace of mind, especially if you’re moving a far distance, that all of your kitchen dishes won’t be crushed to bits.
Make the drive (or flight) a fun adventure
We currently live 20 hours away from our family and it’s funny to hear my kids say they LOVE road trips! I mean, c’mon do you know how far we’re really going to be driving, kids!?
Although I know our kids have moved more than the average person does, it makes me happy knowing they have fond memories about the time we have spent together as a family.
When you get where you’re going, explore!
People who know me know that I’m always up to try new things. Now, I’m not suggesting you have to try everything or do things that make you uncomfortable, but I do think exploring what your new city has to offer is a must.
Not only does it help you to feel more at home by creating new memories for you and your family, but it shows you how to appreciate the uniqueness of that place.
Being a newbie gives you a free pass to ask questions, find your favorite coffee shop, meet new people, etc. You know how the saying goes, ‘When in Rome…’
Adjusting takes time—give it the grocery store test
Don’t forget to cut yourself some slack. You’re going to have good days and bad days and some in between days. But little by little things get easier and, poof, everything is back to normal.
In one of our early moves I discovered the grocery store test. Here’s how it works. When you move somewhere new you don’t typically know anyone and it’s very unlikely that you’ll run into a person you know at the grocery store. As time goes on and you meet more people it’s inevitable you’ll run into someone while you’re out shopping.
To me, just seeing a familiar face somewhere out in public says, “Hey, I got this. I’m making friends, learning my way around, and everything is going to be ok.”