One thing I have learned is that when I trust and unite with my husband’s dreams the provision for my needs and dreams will not be left out.
My advice to a fellow coach’s wife who is going through a difficult season is to realize there is nothing you can do to change the outcome of your husband’s football games but love and support him and leave it in God's hands.
When my girls were younger, I drove myself crazy trying to do it all. Now, I'm able to let things go. You don't have to do it all. Be present and in the moment. My typical motto is, "It will get done..... Eventually."
Each week, “Friday Night Wives” recognizes a coach’s wife by asking her the same five questions. We go through lots of submissions to find entries we think are especially encouraging or insightful. We hope this gives our readers a chance to connect with others’ through their struggles and hardships, as well as learn from someone who has come out on the other side.
Meet Brittany Sloan
1) Tell us a little bit about yourself. Who are you and what do you do?
I’m 30 originally from Spartanburg, SC and graduated from Clemson University. My husband and I have a one-year-old son and I work from home as a bookkeeper for Firehouse Subs thru a CPA firm and I am a MONAT Market Partner.
2) How many years have you been a coach’s wife and what schools have you been to?
My hubby and I have been married for 3 years and this is our 4th season together but he has been coaching for 15 or so years. He coached at Chapman High and Byrnes High school before we got married. Then we got married and moved the next day to Marietta, Ga to Walton High School and now he’s the head coach at Kell High School in the same town.
3) If you could go back in time and have a conversation with yourself as a first year coach’s wife, what’s one thing you would tell yourself?
To not let the fear of not being in one place long keep me from investing in community while I am there. I was pretty miserable our first year because we moved 2.5 hours from my friends, family, and a job I loved to a place I knew no one and a job that I hated. With of the potential of moving, and the fear that comes with that, I waited to invest in the community around me, so I felt so alone most of that first year.
4) How do you find balance between supporting your spouse and supporting yourself so that you don’t lose your mind?
Still working on this one! I think it’s changed since we had our little one, before him it was easy to take a night to myself, grab a drink with a friend or get a pedi. Since having our little guy it’s harder to find the balance in taking care of myself and my family. We spend a lot of time at the school and field to see my hubby. With the hours football season entails it’s harder to get time without feeling like we are being a burden. Right now, I am really just having to force myself to take a break and have some me time.
5) What encouragement do you have for a fellow coach’s wife who currently finds herself in a difficult season and doesn’t feel like she’s measuring up?
Know your life will not look just like anyone else’s, including other coaches’ wives, and that’s perfectly fine! Everyone one must figure out what works best for them, their marriage, and their current stage of life. You do what you can do and don’t feel down on yourself for not doing more. Find yourself a community, in and out of the football world! Know where your entire identity and purpose come from and cling to that.
** If you have a wife you’d like to nominate as our FNW Wife of the Week, please email Lindsey at email@example.com **
Football is a busy life, but family is always top priority. I know he can't be at everything, but he makes arrangements to be at the events that mean the most to us.
Make your home a place to re-charge and be honest. This football life will shape your schedule, your time, and your location, but it does not define you.
My advice to a fellow coach's wife who finds herself in a difficult season, is to surround herself and lean on her tribe. The people who know you the most and understand what it is like in this crazy coaching world are your biggest supporters.
One thing I've learned over the years is that, especially when kids come along, you need help – even if it's just someone to talk to about some of the "yuck" that comes with the season.
This is a daily battle for us. We do go to bed angry at times. At least I do. In the end it’s that choice I talked about, that I chose him, and wouldn’t choose any other because when we are able to communicate, and we are amazing together.