Faith, Journal, Marriage

Friend, You Are Not Alone

I grew up in a small community. There were 76 kids in my graduating class.

Sports played a significant role in my high school years, as both our basketball team and football team were successful and fun to watch. I regularly attended games, often decked-out in as much spirit wear as I could find, sometimes with a painted face. There was nothing quite like it.

In fact, when I think about high school, my mind immediately reverts to the feelings I had in those moments of being packed into the bleachers with friends, or rooting for the football team with my fellow cheerleaders from the sidelines.

The atmosphere was always so electric and invigorating. Our little town never failed to get behind their teams.   

There was one football game in particular, when I remember really taking it all in … the band, the students, the parents, the members of the community who came to support the team, the teachers and administrators … and yes, even the coach’s wife.

I kept watching her from the stands, thinking that she was living the best life—married to a coach and having the opportunity to participate so closely in the lives of the youth he mentored.

I loved watching sports, and I could think of nothing better than being closely connected to a team.    

I’m not sure when the reality actually set in.

Was it the playoffs, when my husband spent countless hours preparing for the game, and then got his heart broken by a narrow loss?

Was it the immense hurt that we felt when my husband took another coaching job, and the place we left ripped him apart on social media for leaving?

Or was it just something that happened over the course of the past 15 years, after experiencing multiple seasons together, wins and losses, and everything that comes along with them?

Whatever it was, I eventually realized that being a coach’s wife was a little more difficult than I once thought.

In fact, I remember crying out to the Lord and telling Him, “I don’t know if I’m cut out for this.”   

“Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go” (Joshua 1:9). I take great comfort in knowing that there is no way I will ever be without my Savior’s love.

When I call to Him in moments of anxiety, fear, and overwhelm, I feel immediately comforted by the fact that I am never alone.

He knows that I am juggling many titles right now: Wife, Mother, Daughter, Sister, Aunt, Employee, Co-Worker, Bill-Payer, Chef, House Cleaner, Taxi, Counselor, Nurturer, Dog Poo Picker-Upper … you get the idea. My list goes on, and I bet yours does too. 

If there is anything I know, it’s that He longs for us to come to Him.

“Cast your burden on the Lord, and He will sustain you” (Psalm 55:22).

He would not have chosen me to be a coach’s wife if He did not think I could handle it.

It brings me great joy to support my husband, and to run alongside him as he chases the dreams that God has placed within his heart. There are times, however, when I become fatigued and begin to feel the weight of the world literally strapped upon my shoulders.

In moments like these, I have to constantly remind myself that the Lord will come to my rescue when I need Him. I just have to ASK. 

Friend, it’s ok to feel overwhelmed and to wonder if this exhaustion will ever pass. It’s ok to let your guard down and to admit that sometimes life is hard, especially in-season.

I just want to encourage you that you are not alone. There are many other coaches’ wives feeling like they need a “Jesus Loves This Hot Mess” t-shirt, too. I am one of them!

Remember, you are blessed … loved beyond measure … (and, here’s the best part) … just as you are!