Journal, Marriage

I couldn’t wait for the season to end. But now that it’s over I want it back.

The clock winds to zero. Just like that, it’s over. All the hard work. All the late nights. All the preparation. The scouting reports. The film. It’s all over. The season has come to an end.

There are tears from those departing at the end of the school year for bigger and better things. Some, continue with their sporting careers. Most are not. But, he gave it his all. Managed his team and managed his home life (with some resistance at times from me)…all for this season. This ONE season.

Once it’s over, I feel like something is missing. There’s no game to get to…and I’ve been trying to get to two games a week for the past 12 weeks. What are the girls and I supposed to do now besides the Pizza Hut kids eat free buffet on Tuesday night after the ball game?

Sometimes it feels as though this season is all he (we) lives for. At times, I feel as though he has forgotten his home life and put aside all the routines of his kids and his wife. He knows I will handle it. The homework. The studying. The dinner. The baths. And the bedtime. All the responsibility is placed on me to keep the family afloat.

But, it seems as though once it’s over, we are missing something. The end of the season messes with my mo-jo. I need routine. My OCD craves it. I need to have the same routine week in and week out, including Coach as we need to for games and practices. Our girls love to see him in the gym.

Once the season is over, he’s back home. Sulking. As though his best friend has moved away. He has invested so much time into these seniors over the past 4 years, it’s hard to let them go even though there is work to do. Some of these girls have been a part of our lives for 7 years though AAU teams and then high school … not just a part of our lives, but our girls’ lives. Growing and maturing … our littles look up to them.

But, with the end of the season, comes the next season. And there’s work to do for the next season. Really, there is only two weeks of off-season. When there isn’t off-season (dead period), there’s preseason, season, and post-season.

Don’t get me wrong. I love sports just as much as the next coach’s wife, but it’s nice to have Coach home more. I anticipate…and long for…his homecoming for 8 months (football and basketball season lasts a loooooong time). Then he’s home for one week and I am ready to send him back. I hate seeing him so sad. So out of sorts.

We’ve had multiple discussions in our coaching tenure about how he isn’t himself when he is home without something to do (Believe me! There’s plenty to do around the house!). He misses the game. He misses the preparation. He feels he always needs to be doing something (guess you should have chosen a different career than being a teacher since you get 2 months off every summer…plus fall, Christmas, and spring breaks).

When he’s home. He’s pacing. He’s watching the professionals. And when I say he is watching professional games…he’s looking for a new play, a new angle, a new place to set the screen and a new way to get the post open. A new way to run this BLOB, SLOB, or zone offense. It never ends.

Date night? We are off to an AAU tournament. Anniversary? That has to wait until dead period. And I’m okay with that. I am a former athlete who loves to watch basketball and football (any sport for the matter) without someone tugging at me, laying on my lap, or asking to go to the bathroom.

But, I signed up for this. If it makes him happy, it makes me happy. It makes me happy to have my husband home. But, at the end of the day, I need him to get back to the drawing board. To the BLOBs, SLOBs, and offense/defensive schemes. There are more young women who need coaching…learning….not just for the game…but for life.

Honey. That anniversary trip? It can wait. I’ll see you during dead period. I love you.