One thing I have learned is that when I trust and unite with my husband’s dreams the provision for my needs and dreams will not be left out.
And goodnight football, until next season.
The less planning we need to do during the season, the easier life is for everyone. It doesn’t matter how busy our week is, my kids insist they need dinner every night! I’ve yet to convince them a bowl of popcorn and some apple slices is a well-balanced meal, so instead I’ve learned to keep a few things stashed in the freezer to avoid the drive-thru as often as possible.
It's October. It's football season. It's week 8. It's 90 degrees. I'm pretty sure some penalty flags are in order...
Oh, how I'd love to throw them!
Fragrant foul: Laundry. Unnecessary roughness, nose guard. Offensive violation, tail back. Off putting penalties.
Illegal motion: Away Games. 60-mile penalty.
Horse collar: twin toddlers. Fifteen-minute time out.
Personal foul: Halloween. Unsportsmanlike conduct. Fifteen Reese's cups from the time of pillage.
Holding penalty: October. Illegal grasp on summer. 25 degree penalty. Automatic cool down.
Let me be clear – we are not better off or more saddled than any other organization out there – football, dance, everything in this realm has its own ups and downs. We all deserve the spotlight, and I’m hoping this brings some support to the band family I have come to love very much. Have your team sit through a performance, I challenge them to go to a competition even. Learning how to respect your comrades is just as important as respecting your competition – it’s sportsmanship at its finest.
I had parked myself right in front of a broken cistern. I'd fill it up, but all my joy and peace and compassion still seeped through the crevices and cracks, until it was once again empty. I would fill my tank up and only get a mile down the road before I was out of gas again. I wasn't filling it with living water; I was filling it with muck, sludge, and junk. It was broken. I was broken.
I coined a term several years back; I’m not proud to say that the phrase “mid-season meltdown” came about because I noticed for myself that every October I hit a wall. A point of no return would reveal itself again where I just couldn’t tolerate one more team dinner, or one more date night that ended with watching film, or one more night feeling that all my hard work keeping the house organized was about the blow up by 10 am the next morning.
There is no greater pride I feel when I see our band family take the field. For seven minutes, after hundreds of hours of work and sweat, I realize what all of the chaos in our household was meant for. Sure, there’s still a stain on my favorite sweater, I cannot seem to locate my son’s purple race car and cereal has replaced my real dinner. Watching my soulmate use his God-given talent along with hundreds of others beside him, makes my job worth it.
But that phrase reminds me that yes, while I am struggling -- absolutely, positively, no-doubt-about-it struggling -- that doesn't mean I'm failing. I've gotten some points on the board. Not as many as I'd like, but some.
If there is one important lesson that I have learned about friends and football it's this: you can't do one without the other. It's as simple as that. Ask any coach's wife – this part of the year can be so incredibly lonely.
One of the most amazing treasures a coaching family receives from their community is people who welcome them with friendship. Being new in town is always stressful. Even if you move every few years (or more often), it’s never easy to be the new family.
What I do know is there will be many more days filled with tears as we drive away from the field. There will be many more missed moments and milestones that have to be sent to our coach via video. And there will be more days where 40 minutes is all we can get.
But there will be many more highs too.
I get excited when the last quarter rolls around and that clock starts winding down. Mommy reminds me that football minutes are a little longer than REAL minutes. But even if my eyes are getting heavy, the excitement around me keeps my energy up.
This isn’t the first season I’ve had to promise Coach that I’ll see him the next one. That’s how I know it will be just fine. Because just like football seasons, marriages have seasons, too.
Today is my husband’s first day of football camp, and I cannot help but get so excited thinking about this upcoming season. It is so easy for us to get wrapped up in the excitement of the beginning of the season, as we anxiously await the first game day. However, as coaches’ wives, we know …
But please know, on those hard days, when it seems like I'm SO over it, I don't begrudge this life we chose one bit. I am not bitter. I don't wish you were anything else but what and who you are. Not for one second.
Suddenly I began praying for God to multiply ME during this temporary separation. Multiply my peace, patience, joy, energy, and rest. And do you know what I’ve learned? He still multiplies and it’s not just food! He truly has multiplied ME. He is carrying me through this situation in a way that is not my natural inclination.
We asked the ladies of the FNW Facebook group for tips. How do they keep from losing their minds during season? What are ways they keep from getting overwhelmed and stressed out?