When Coach Takes a Nap
The garage door finally opens, and Coach walks in from a morning of film and an afternoon of meetings. Saturdays are typically just another day that he is away from home—and away from us—working long hours to plan for the next game.
This morning, I wrangled a toddler who was constantly asking for a snack even though we had just eaten a meal. I have been cleaning up messes left and right. I have been avoiding and soothing tantrums with each little upset. I was just trying to keep my sanity for one more day until Coach gets a short break to be home.
When the alarm system dings for the open door, I feel a breath of relief exhale. A helper and a second teammate has finally entered the game.
Then, he sits in his arm chair and before I can ask how his morning went or what they ate for lunch, snores resound from his side of the room.
It’s hard to not feel resentment or disappointment settle in. I have waited all day for some help, but now I have to continue as a one woman team. I’m exhausted. I’m frustrated. Frankly, I’m tired of being snack patrol and answering so many dang “why?” questions.
There have been many days that I let the emotions spew out, and the silent treatment or sass given to my husband are anything but loving and kind.
I know he is tired from the long hours at work. He has been up early and gone to bed after midnight for days in a row. I know he needs rest, but I need him to. I need his attention and adult conversation. I need his presence and full mind without the distractions that come home from work.
Sometimes, I feel that football has robbed us from even his time “off.”
Today though, I send the toddler back to build legos and I let him rest. He sleeps away as I keep her from climbing up onto his chair to play.
I realize that if I want his full attention and presence, he needs to recharge. He just needs a moment to reset. This, I can give to him. I am called to serve him. This is how he needs me today.
Football season comes with long hours and dedication from him. Anyone in this role can see what it requires of him.
However, what we don’t always see and what I often forget are the long hours of service needed from me at the home. The dishes and clothes need to be washed, the child needs to be fed and cared for, and the to do list grows with each passing day. I pray that as I serve, my heart will stay soft and not grow hard toward what is needed from me in this season.
I pray that I consciously choose to continue serving him and our daughter each day, and that the Lord will keep bitterness and selfish desires set aside.
I know that Coach wants to help and to serve me as well. I know that he doesn’t choose to check out for four months (nor does he). I know that the exhaustion is not his goal.
For now, he needs me to extend grace, and I need God to provide that for me to give. I pray that I can be a wife flowing with love and mercy in this season and for all time.
Wherever you may be in your season of life, whether sports draw your husband away or other needs keep your family busy, find grace to extend. Pray for a servant’s heart, and for God to show you the joy for days that often feel lonely or draining.
Alex Kate is entering the fifth season as football and head softball coach’s wife. Married to her high school sweetheart and first love, she is also “mom” to a goofy two year old girl with another kiddo on the way. Alex Kate loves to invest in and encourage other coaches’ wives as well as high school students and athletes. When not at a ball field, she is teaching high school math, catching up on the latest Netflix binge, and finding new outlets for her creative side.