Family, Journal, Marriage

Why My Husband Isn’t Choosing Football Over Family

Football wives have a running joke, saying, “Football has started—time to say goodbye to our husbands!” And we get it. But people on the outside don’t always get it. Instead, they ask, “Where is he?” “Why isn’t he at home?” “Why doesn’t he help more?” “Why can’t he come with you to places?”

And each year, I have to explain to those people that each marriage dynamic is different. What works for us may not work for you, and that is okay. But he is not putting us on the back-burner. Football is not a priority over family. 

Here’s why:

Those boys are an extension of our family. 

My husband isn’t the only one choosing to care for them. Our family will always extend whatever support we can to them. Feeding them, helping their families, helping with homework, college applications, highlight videos, etc. It takes a village to raise kids and these young men are no different. My husband was called to do this, but this is no indication that what he’s leaving at home is any less taken care of. Which leads me to…

His family is taken care of because he has someone to pick up his slack. Some of these players don’t have that at home. 

My husband will forever have me to tag team the home life. During the season, I may pick up quite a bit of extra slack, but that doesn’t make us any less of a team. Our kids see both parents putting in the work every day to make sure they are loved and cared for. Some of our players can’t say the same. When they leave practice, they may not have someone asking when they ate last, if their homework is done, or how much sleep they got last night. Coaches can’t do their job without ensuring their players are taken care of on and off the field. 

My kids see what he does and they are learning to be a good human being. 

My daughters are watching him love others as much as he loves them and they mimic that. They are picking up on that at a young age and as a result, I’m raising children who want to make sure others are taken care of as much as they are. Their characteristics are being shaped into strong and caring personalities. 

Football is our family. 

My kids aren’t leaving games wondering why their dad chooses this life. Football has been a part of their lives since birth. This is as natural and normal for them as going to school each day is. It’s just something we do.

My husband isn’t choosing football over us; we are choosing football with him. We are a football family. 

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