Relationships can be tough to navigate. Add in being part of a coaches’ life, and relationships can feel nearly impossible to manage, especially during the season. While it may seem impossible, it can be done! Here are ten ways to stay better connected during the season!
1. Prioritize communication.
Communication is tough, but vital. My husband and I are still learning, but some things we’ve found that help are to text any schedule changes and make sure to ask each other questions. We also bought a chalkboard weekly calendar that both of us can update, and it hangs right by our door. If we find our relationship is struggling, we’ve been working to better vocalize the things that we are struggling with or need from the other. These are just a few options, and they may not work for everyone. The key is to be intentional. Find what works for you as a couple, and strive to be intentional with it.
2. Leave his favorite drink or snack out for him to take to work in the morning.
If you have a little extra time, write a little note and set it out with the special treat. It’s simple and sweet—something basic to surprise him and remind him that you care.
3. Write a little note and leave it where he will see it.
Springing off the last one, if you don’t feel like putting together a drink or a snack, you can write him a note! It could be as simple as a sticky note on the mirror that says “I love you,” or as complex as a deeply thought out love note. I also enjoy notes that list “10 Reasons I Love You,” or “10 Reasons You are My Superman.” Let your heart lead on this one and allow the words to flow freely.
4. Get two blank journals and write to each other every day you get the chance, then exchange journals at the end of the season.
In our first year of marriage, I was still finishing college. We lived in one town and I commuted weekly and stayed with family to finish my classes in a town three hours away. It was tough. A friend suggested that we each get a journal and write in it nightly for each other, if possible. We could jot down everything we were feeling, and then exchange the journals at the end of our separated time. We did this, and it was amazing what it did. Not only did it give us both an outlet to express our struggles with the separation, our love and all that we were feeling, but when we exchanged journals and read what the other had written, it showed us a depth to one another that we had not experienced yet and drew us closer together. This could be so easily applied to the coaching life! Grab a couple of journals and start writing to each other at the beginning of the season, exchange them at the end of the season and see what it does for your relationship!
5. Get creative with dates.
If that means going to the field and hanging out while he works just to be able to spend a little time together, do it! Does he coach an outdoor sport? Maybe you can stargaze on the field after he finishes practice. Does he have a favorite drink? Pick it up and go hang out with him while he does office work. It may not be fancy, but at least it is time together. Get creative!
6. Send an encouraging text.
Surprise him with a text reminding him of the things you appreciate about him! Or simply say, “I love you!” Sometimes those words of love and affirmation are all we need to strengthen our relationship.
7. Go to games when you can.
For most of the coaches in our lives, going to the game and showing our support for what they do is extremely meaningful. Obviously, everyone has very different schedules and making it to games can be hard to fit in. Even if you can only make it to a few games, do it! It will probably mean a lot to your coach to have you there cheering him on.
8. If you cannot make it, ask how the game went.
It may seem basic, but if you can’t make it to a game, check in with him and see how the game went! It’s a little thing that shows you are involved and that you care about the outcome of his games.
9. Learn his love language and work to implement loving him in that way more.
If you don’t already know your love languages, The 5 Love Languages test is free, and takes very little time to go through, while offering valuable relationship insight. Find out what his love language is and work on showing him love in that way more often. There are so many interesting ways this could be applied!
10. Tell him “I love you."
It’s the most basic thing, yet something that is so easy to forget to say in the business that is life. Don’t let him forget that you still love him.