At the age of 19, I became a coach’s girlfriend. So, to say that all the lessons I’ve learned in my adult life were through the lens of this lifestyle wouldn’t be an exaggeration.
I observed from the very beginning just how difficult and unpredictable life would be if I stayed with coach. But if you met my coach (and I am confident it’s probably the same for most coaches), you’d know that coaching is his God-given talent and calling (and to be honest, mine doesn’t really have any skills for another profession).
So, my options were either to live this life ... or live a life without him.
I realized the things that would make him a great husband and father where also the same qualities that made him an impactful coach and I couldn’t separate the two.
Also, while I am being honest, I never actually wanted to go where the job was taking us. If I had my way, I'd still be in the comfort of my hometown, cheering on the same school, never even curious as to what else was out there.
But, I have learned just how important faith is in this lifestyle. Even though we cannot control where or when there will be an opening, what an athletic director wants in a candidate, or any of the other hundreds of things that are factored into a coach getting or keeping a job, the One planning the path has my best interest in mind.
God sees the bigger picture and has far greater things in store than you or I could even dream possible. Knowing this has helped me trust that when things don't go my way, something better is coming.
That doesn't make this coach’s wife life much easier. But over the past 17 years, I’ve been able to observe and learn from not only my own journey, but also countless others that I have been blessed to cross paths with.
While a nice break from continually picking up the slack and maybe more date night opportunities that didn’t involve a field would be helpful in sustaining our energy, we all know that those things could never happen enough.
So, I’ve come to the conclusion that coaches' wives who develop 4 characteristics—patience, perspective, perseverance, and peace—end up being able to walk through this life with a little more determination and ease.
Don’t get me wrong, I still struggle with every one of them, even after all this time and experience. But, I have seen God work and have come to understand that it’s through Him that I can have or be these things when necessary.
I will use my stories and lessons learned to help you see the magnitude of each characteristic.
And I just want to note that I use the word “wife” because it’s short and simple. But there is nothing simple about being the main support for someone in the world of athletics.
So, whether you’re a coach’s wife, fiancé, girlfriend, mom, grandma or sibling, this is for you. Whether you are the significant other of an Athletic Director, Band Director, Athletic Trainer, Marketer, Ticketer, Analyst, or any other vital role, you are welcome here.
In a lifestyle based on competition and achievements, we may not all have the same colors and mascots, but we are all on the same team.
Reading through this 2 week devotional, I hope that you strengthen your ability to be not only coach’s rock, foundation and support, but also your own. Let it help you to become an all-in coach’s wife.
An All-In Coach’s Wife is someone who knows that her worth does not come from attending every game, hosting all the team meals, or crafting the perfect snack bags.
She knows that she’s not in competition with other wives, but is meant to reach her hand out to help whoever is in need.
An All-In Coach’s Wife can assess her season of life and adjust her level of participation accordingly, without guilt or regret.
She knows her strengths and shares them, but also allows others to support where her weaknesses are.
She knows “coach’s wife” isn’t her only identity, or even her most important one.
And most importantly, she has faith that God is in control of her path and her future, and that He’s just using this lifestyle to get her where she's meant to be.