For the longest time, I thought I needed faith to survive this coach's wife lifestyle. And I do. That is very true. My mindset and quality of life changed dramatically once faith became my foundation.
But the more I work on my faith by walking with Jesus and hearing from God through His Word, the more I realize that it goes both ways. I am a better coach's wife because of my faith. BUT I am a better Christian because I am a coach's wife.
Obedience and surrender are major themes in faith. Dying to oneself and having a sacrificial attitude are also essential to the Christian walk. And as a veteran coach's wife of 21 years, I can confirm that those themes are a significant part of this lifestyle.
This lifestyle gives us a daily practice of "dying to oneself." As scary as this sounds, what it means is that what we want isn't our number one priority. That probably just registered a large "yup!" for all the coaches' wives reading this. When we started a family, I was forced to empty myself of anything that I could want. There just wasn't enough energy, time, or brain space to even accomplish my smallest desires. As terrible as that sounds, it truly opened me up to the much better that God had in store for us. And I know I would not have been open or available to it if this lifestyle hadn't taken me to that place of emptiness.
This lifestyle gives us a daily practice to "pick up our cross." This term means to sacrifice. And I know I don't have to explain to fellow wives about the level of self-sacrifice required when married to a coach. Even if we have our own careers and dreams, they come second. And if we want them, we have to work extra hard just to do the minimum because other things take precedence. There are many times when he can't help or rearrange his schedule. And there is no way around having to move in order to advance in his career, which most likely results in sacrificing or, at best slowing down, progress in ours.
This lifestyle gives us a yearly practice to "walk by faith." For 15 years, we lived year to year, never knowing if we were staying or going at the end of the season. It could have come from doing too well just as much as from doing very poorly. Even now, with a contract that states we are secure for 5 years, there are plenty of things and people that could change that. NOTHING is guaranteed in this lifestyle other than seasons come to an end. So, I learned to trust that wherever we'd go, it was because we were sent there by God, not because of an athletic director or one too many losses.
These things used to be my least favorite parts of this lifestyle. While that really hasn't changed, I have learned to appreciate the hands-on, constant lessons from this lifestyle that make it so much easier to be a follower of Christ.
Most people only talk the talk. But because of this coaching lifestyle, we walk the walk everyday.
These are the hardest part of Christianity for most people to understand and we are living it every day. I know that doesn't make it easier, but that bigger picture helps me to see the purpose in the hardships.
Being a Christian has helped me to be a better coach's wife. But without a doubt, being a coach's wife has made me the best Christian I could ever possibly be.