This is my third season as a football coach's significant other. I quickly learned that the hours were long, but when my husband became a head coach, those hours turned into days.
He leaves the house at 5 AM for practice, before I even wake up, and doesn't get home until 8 PM. On game days? Forget it. He's at the school until 1 AM, only to be gone again at 5 AM for the post-game film.
During football season, we get an average of 32 waking hours a week together. That leaves a whole lot of alone time. And for a while, I didn't know what to do with that. I tracked his every move, harassed him to come home, and let anger build up for all the moments he wasn't there.
Then, when he finally came home, I'd waste that precious time being mad and fighting. And then, one day randomly, a friend said to me, "I'm so jealous of all your alone time."
And then it hit me—this alone time I had been resenting was actually a gift.
It is a gift to watch all the shows he doesn't like, dive into a good book, work on my blog, or reconnect with people I care about. And once I shifted my perspective, I saw this time for what it truly was: an opportunity for self-care.
Alone Time is an Opportunity, Not a Burden
Alone time, especially as a wife and mom, is a rare thing. I know that during the off-season, my husband sticks to me like white on rice. So, I've purposed to view football season as my time to reclaim solitude. Instead of focusing on what's missing, I focus on what I get to do when he's away.
The season is the perfect chance to indulge in all the things you don't have time or space for when your husband and kids are around. So, embrace it! Here are some ways I've learned to make the most of my alone time—and how you can too.
5 Meaningful Things to Do When You're Alone as a Coach's Wife:
1. Pursue a Creative Hobby-
For me, that's writing—whether it's a blog post or working on social media content creation. Creative outlets are a great way to express yourself and focus on something you love. If writing isn't your thing, try photography, painting, knitting, or anything that sparks your creativity. This is your opportunity to create something meaningful while doing something you love.
2. Get Active-
I've started using my alone time for running and hiking, and let me tell you, there's something empowering about getting out into nature and pushing yourself physically. Not only does exercise clear your mind, but it also helps you stay healthy and energized, which is especially important when you're juggling so many things solo during football season. Plus, physical activity reduces stress and keeps you feeling good, both mentally and physically.
3. Engage with Your Community-
When the house gets too quiet, I reach out to my community—brunch with friends, dinners with my mom and brother, or just a quick catch-up phone call with an old work buddy. Staying connected with those who lift you up can make all the difference when you're feeling isolated. Building a strong support system ensures you're never truly alone, even when your husband is away for hours.
4. Focus on Personal Development-
Use this time to invest in yourself. For me, it's reading a good book or working on certification courses that will help me in my career or personal life. Whether you're learning something new or deepening your knowledge, this alone time is perfect for leveling up. You're growing and investing in yourself, which boosts confidence and keeps your mind sharp.
5. Dive Into a Good Book or Show-
When all else fails, Netflix is always there for me! I love binge-watching rom-coms or indulging in Bravo's reality shows. Sometimes you just need a little mindless entertainment to unwind and relax after a long day. It's a fun and easy way to take a mental break and recharge.
Making the Most of Solitude
Alone time doesn't have to feel lonely. With a shift in mindset, it can be a space for self-care, creativity, and personal growth. Embrace these moments as an opportunity to focus on yourself, knowing that your husband is out there doing something he loves too.
And when the season's over, you'll be refreshed, more fulfilled, and ready to spend time together again without any resentment.