Nine years ago, we reached one of the mountain tops that my husband had been dreaming about since he started playing in the 5th grade. For almost two and a half decades, he had pictured what it would be like to get to that point. But the funny thing about mountain tops is that no one really thinks about the valley where you have to start, and the climb it takes to reach the top.
It might be hard to believe, but this was the season that almost broke me. It was our most successful season to date, which meant it went almost a full month longer than normal. I basically had to navigate adding a third kid to the mix on my own. I had three tiny, needy humans with me almost all day, every day.
Out of all the seasons, everything we'd been through, this was the season that almost did me in. But I kept the struggles to myself because I didn't think I had a right to complain. Every instance was planned for, worked towards, hoped for, and prayed for. All the difficulties were born out of something good.
This season tested my sanity. It tested my faith. It tested my strength and endurance. It tested my will and desire to be a coach's wife.
But I've learned that on the other side of tests are needed lessons for growth. Because another funny thing about mountain tops is that you can’t stay there forever. You eventually have to come down and brace yourself for the next climb.
When my husband looks at the picture from that mountain top from nine years ago, he sees how close he got to the peak and all the things that kept him from reaching it. He has learned and implemented changes from that lesson. When I look at it, though, I see that I’ve done hard things. I am capable of a climb that’s more difficult than I could have ever imagined.
Looking back now, I can see that it was preparing me for an even harder time- the next mountain top in our journey. This was the peak that he’d been working towards since that very first day he realized that coaching was his calling.
The next mountain top in our journey was when my husband became a head coach, and that was the hardest transition we've ever experienced. And not only that, his first season as a head coach was filled with more adversity than all his 15 seasons as an assistant combined.
That's the only reason I survived the harder times. It was because I was open to the lessons of the hard times.
I didn't hide my struggles this time. That had only led to isolation, and that was a terrible place to be. I might have sugar-coated them in sarcasm and Frozen 2 lyrics, but I shared them. And because of this, I have been able to help those coming up behind me- either by leaving breadcrumbs along the path for them to grab whenever they get there or by physically grabbing them by the hand and pulling them up to the next ledge.
And the biggest lesson I have learned over our 22 seasons of mountain tops and valleys is that God is the One leading us- not me, not my husband, and not his job. And I can rest in the fact that He's the best guide to follow.
“He refreshes my soul. He guides me along the right paths for his name’s sake.” Psalm 23:3 NIV
Amid struggles, it can be hard to hold on to hope. It can be next to impossible to keep the faith. But, I promise you that if you focus on putting one foot in front of the other and trust that the ultimate plan is for your prosperity. Believe that the victory has already been won, and it ends in your favor. Eventually, you look up and realize you've reached the top. And you’ve become stronger, better prepared, and more equipped to handle the next hard thing that is coming your way.
This space is about supporting the women behind the sidelines. We’ve created a few favorite wear-on-repeat pieces inspired by this life, just in case you want to check them out!