When He Shows Up

When He Shows Up

Y'all. Let me tell you, I MISS my husband. I know everyone can relate- how empty it feels when your partner in everything is away from home more and how you and the kids are all adjusting to a piece of your heart missing.

Our schedule works out that we have a series of away games, all between an hour and two and a half away, with B team and JV games scheduled the night before. Which means the moments where it feels like my husband is missing is more often than not.

In the middle of all of this- my emotions get in the way, and I start letting the thoughts creep in. Does he still love us as much? Does he miss us as much as we miss him? He seems distracted on this game day and distant from all of us.

Ha. Of course, he is. His busy period is just getting started.

But it's in these moments where I'm missing his presence the most that I have found that he is still just as much a part of our family as before, and he's still showing up. In this instance, it was in the moments passed in the night. An all-too-late JV game left me cleaning out the truck to prepare for switching vehicles so that coach could drive the trailer, which left me going to bed not long after the kids.

The next afternoon of feeling those moments of frustration at the busyness of the schedule, and I find myself so thankful for the seemless transition that switching vehicles was. How my selfless husband, still trying to show up for his family, spent time and energy after a late night game to finish switching the car seats and installing them, the car tag, the stroller, my work keys, the baby wrap and game bag before going to bed himself.

He still shows up. When shared students tell him I'm having a rough day, and I get a text checking in on me. It's the call in the morning after we've left for the car line, moments before the drop off of "Guys- I love you. I hope you have a great day."

It's the coming home and knowing that that garden bed needs some love, and I haven't had a chance to get to it, so he spends the 15 minutes working after practice while I'm running to the grocery store with the kids in tow.

It's when he goes in to see each of our boys after they're both tucked in and asleep when he gets home or when he chooses to lay with our infant, and they both fall asleep exhausted from the day. It's when he takes the time to watch a show your big kid is into or make sure that family night happens on Saturday— and he stays up well into the morning to spend time with everyone and still watch film.

I pray that in the season where you are the busiest that you are choosing to see those moments where your coach is putting you first.

I pray that you recognize that you and your coach are always on the same team, and even though sometimes you're like passing ships in the night- that coach is still checking, still making sure you and your family are loved and taken care of.


Alexandra Kay is an football wife, mom of 2 boys in South Carolina. She and coach teach at the same high school where she teaches English.  
Back to blog